John Bender

I think he might be related to Simon Cowell. The truth is a powerful and hurtful thing, and I never have witnessed anyone in real life able to dish it out like Mr. Bender. I wish he could take me out to lunch and tell me everything he thinks about me. I would probably be more enlightened and a lot more depressed. But maybe we could smoke some weed together and then he could give me some clothing pointers.